Old Pictures, New Attitude

Last week I found myself looking through old pictures. A couple of years ago this activity would have been…difficult.

I would look at a picture and see everything but myself. I would see a visible belly outline and an extra chin. I would see every calorie I had ever consumed and every mile I didn’t run. I would see every failure, every rejection, every cruel joke at my expense. I would see a before picture.

Luckily, 3 years ago some crazy lady on the internet  suggested to me that maybe I didn’t have to hate myself. It’s been a tug-o-war, kicking, screaming, 1 step forward, 3 steps back, all out brawl kind of journey. There have been days weeks months where I thought that it was hopeless. It took courage to keep coming back but it was worth it!

This time was different. I saw pictures of myself that I used to hate and now I think that I actually look really nice! I love my crazy hair, my visible belly outline, my soft curves. I looked at myself with love. It was an experience I have never had before. I am so proud of how far I’ve come and I am so happy to keep going!

Now it’s my turn to be the crazy lady on the internet. I know that everyone reading this knows these negative feelings or has known them at some point. I promise that you are worthy of love and unconditional acceptance. You are worthy of being looked upon and adored. You are worthy of respect and admiration. You. Are. Worthy!!

-Amy out

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5 thoughts on “Old Pictures, New Attitude

    • Thanks, Amber!
      That’s a hard question to answer because the journey was long and complicated and I still have a long way to go. I think a huge part of it for me was exposing myself every day to body positive media and surrounding myself with body positive influences. I recommend reading themilitantbaker.com and danceswithfat.wordpress.com. These ladies address a lot of the political aspects of body acceptance that really helped me gain a sense of purpose. I also did a course with Golda Portensky at bodylovewellness.com that helped me address a lot of the thought processes that were really negative. I also recommend reading Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon. It helped me remove my focus from my weight and to instead focus on healthful habits. There are a lot of wonderful resources out there to help you!!
      Lastly, I recommend extreme doses of self compassion. Learning to forgive myself when I have negative thoughts or I am not at my best has really been at the heart of it all. It’s what gives me permission to come back and try again when I fail and it’s what has carried me this far. I know you can do it too!!

  1. You are the most beautiful amazing women I know .. self love is the hardest thing in the world .. I struggle too with it .. you make me so happy by reading this and knowing you see what I see.. I can only work on myself and one day see what my greatest friends see in me when I look at a picture of myself .. you are such an inspiration 🙂 love you and keep on being the rad Amy I know 🙂

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